Friday, 30 October 2009

Aesthetica Therapy

Hot bananas! One of my poems has been short listed for "International Aesthetica Creative Works Competition".

Amongst the misery of your pitiful existence I suggest you buy a copy of the magazine/book (you can get a hard copy, it's easier to wipe away your ugly loner tears from the cover) to bring about a tiny ray of less-misery.

Though it won't find you a girlfriend, a better job or physical prowess, it does have pretty pictures and words in it. Check it out here:

Release date is 1 December 2009, available in Borders or from the Aesthetica website.

Die or die trying.

Russell Jones

Thursday, 29 October 2009


Here me vomit at 'The Elvis Shakespeare' on Leith Walk, Edinburgh, this Sunday. Sick off is 2pm.

It's a book launch, by the by. Here's a review of the book:

Russell Jones

Wednesday, 21 October 2009


"How do you get youw bwilliant ideas, mister?" asks little Timmy

"I take them from the souls of children, Timmy"

It's a common question, one which my mum asks me at least three times a year. Truth is I've very little imagination left since I had to do adult things like defrost fridge freezers or get excited about potato mashers.

I come up with a theme and then try out different forms or phrases. That's my way. Past themes have included:

- Fish

- Alcohol

- Children

- Water

- Science Fiction

Put them in to a number generating machine and you'll work out my sadistic plan.

My current project is to write a stupid number of sonnets based on "extremophiles". They're not super paedos, they're organisms which thrive in extreme situations, like emperor penguins stupidly breeding in Antarctic winters.

If life can exist under ice, in volcanos, in isolated caves etc., could it exist in the vacuum of space? In the centre of the sun? In a word or an idea? Even in my girlfriend's filthy bedroom?

And that's what I'm doing. Here's the first one free, each one after that will cost you:

Russell Jones

Publicating Me

read my poems readmypoems ReadMyPoems READMYCOCKINGPOEMS

This is what goes through every poet's head. Well, except those poets who write things and then lock them away in secret drawers beneath the microwave.

I keep a list. A dark and secret list of foul things I'd like to do to members of the general public. You can't see that one, but I also keep a list of my past publications so I can stalk myself and weep whilst sitting in a pile of my own excrement.

As you'll no doubt notice, being a smart bastard, the list is a little shady to begin with. I've also not bothered with some useful information such as ISBN numbers, so you'll just have to trust me that it's a real list and then send me that £20 you owe me.

THE LIST (oldest to most recent)

crap Love/Romance book
BBC Get Writing Anthology 2005
other crap book
manchester arts mag
sentinal poetry magazine, may 05
the voice (multiple)
the drum (multiple)
Jabberwocky x2 (winter, spring)
golden hour book
masters V book
Read This, issues 5/9
writer's dock children's book
Platform Magazine Nottingham (travel writing: California)
Earth Love (issue 29, nov 2008)
Equinox (sep 08 or mar 09)
First time Magazine (issue 55, 56 – march 2009?)
Fire (issue 32, winter 09/10)
Scintilla 13 (spring 2009)
Salopoet (december 2008, june 09)
Frogmore Papers (iss 74, September 09)
This Collection (film project 2009)
Carillon magazine (23, march 09, issue 24 june 09)
Southbank centre online (equinox electronic form) (2009)
‘the last refuge’ – my chap book, aug 09
Golden hour 2 – sep 09
Aesthetica magazine – dec 09?

Russell Jones

Friday, 9 October 2009

Shhhh...Talking in the Library

A fine chap named Ken McLeod has invited me to speak about the interactions of Science and Poetry at the Scottish Poetry Library on Wednesday 13th January 2010 at 5:30pm.

I want you there, you sexy beast.

Check out Ken's current projects on science and society here:

Russell Jones

Smart Ickle Art Ickle

A month or so ago I wrote a tremendously nonsensical (but fun) article about voices in Science Fiction Poetry which talked about dressing dogs in costumes, wearing colostomy bags and boiling pig snouts in black sauce. As academic journals appear to have a strong distaste for such things, it now exists as something rather different but still moderately interesting and will be published in an upcoming academic thingymajig for Edinburgh University's literature journal, "Forum".

If you enjoy ripping the beating heart out of newborn puppies, you might enjoy this little romp too.

The link available when it's available, calm down! Until then why not look at other things "Forum" likes to talk about:

Russell Jones


There's finally an ad for my chapbook, "The last Refuge" on the internet! Golly gosh. The layout of the sample poem is a heaping pile of horse vomit, but the words are there. On the same site you can also buy a better book, "The Golden Hour Book 2" which has famous people writing in it and everything. Go here and buy them now. Go on. The books are free if you buy the words inside.

Russell Jones

Thursday, 1 October 2009

Let's go on a date

I'm not sure why (bomb threats, perhaps) but the date has changed for my reading at Elvis and Shakespeare. It's now Sunday 1st November at 2pm. Coffee will still be there, so will my hands. It's on Leith walk in Edinburgh, bring a knife.

Russell Jones

National Poetry Day

It's national poetry day soon (8th of October)! It's just like Christmas but without nice food, presents or Santa, but with lots of poems. To celebrate such a festive time, Wester Hailes Education Centre plan on having me reading a few ditties and answering a few top notch questions from students. If you're a student at WHEC then come along, if you're not then simply de-age, register at the school and join us in the library!

Russell Jones